Blowing this popsicle stand

Well, I'm outta here, I'm going to Miami. We are heading down to Miami to watch University of Cincinnati play Virginia Tech in the Orange Bowl. Hopefully, after a 17 hour drive down we will be able to party in the New Year on the beach. I don't wish the city snow but it would be great if it happened while we are gone. LOL.

I just want to say Happy New Year to everyone and I hope everyone stays safe. Don't drink and drive.

See ya next year.

Merry Christmas

There are so many things I'm feeling, things I want to say and questions that I have to ask. However, I'm scared to do so. I did ask back in November if we would be traveling in December. I knew before I asked what the answer would be but I asked anyway. Now, I don't want to ask my questions or say my thoughts out loud for fear of the outcome.

There are many people who are praying for the children at the center, our children, to be able to come home with us. It's great that is comforting to some. For those that know me, God has not been a part of my life for many years. I used to pray when I was younger, now it's seems pointless. I prayed many years for only one thing, after this disappointment I began to feel God has no control over the things that happen. Others may disagree and that's okay but this is how I feel.

I do believe we are tested in life and this has been a difficult test for Chris and I. We thank you for your prayers and thoughts. The date of March 1st has come up in speaking with our agency. We hope to know more news then or to know at least what is our next step. Until then this is all I know. My heart breaks that Nieman can't be with us at Christmas. It breaks more thinking of the what ifs so I try not to dwell on the what ifs. When and if we have news this will be the first place to look.

PS: Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Go UC. We are Orange Bowl bound. Welcome to Miami.

Joint Council

The Joint Council is one of the oldest and largest child welfare organizations, Joint Council on International Children’s Services is the lead voice on inter country children’s services. With a mission to advocate on behalf of children in need of permanent, safe and loving families, Joint Council promotes ethical child welfare practices, strengthens professional standards and educates adoptive families, social service professionals and government representatives throughout the world. International child welfare agencies, child advocacy groups, parent support groups and international medical clinics choose membership in Joint Council as a means to address the critical issue of parent less children and creating permanent solutions.

Right now, they are working on getting the new memorandum in place to open Vietnam back up to the US for international adoptions. You can find out more information and what you can do to help by visiting their website. http://www.jcics.org/Vietnam.htm This may not help us get Nieman but it will help future families who want to adopt from Vietnam to be able to do so.

People are always telling me I should call different government officials to help with our adoption but this is something you guys can do to help other families and maybe us down the road.

Merry Christmas if I don't post before then.

No news

There is no news, no news at all. Why is there no news, no one knows why. The director of our agency is in Vietnam now trying to get an answer as to why we can't come get the baby. He is trying many different things to get the answer. We may not know if these things he is doing will work for several weeks.

In other news, Christmas is 16 days away and we have no presents bought. We have not put up the tree yet. I have some decorations up but it's very unorganized. Chris is working on the cards. I hope to get it all together this week. This is why Christmas bothers me so much. We are always so last minute with everything and I HATE being unorganized.

Well, much to do so talk to you all later.

Happy Birthday to Chris

I want to wish my wonderful husband, Happy Birthday. He is a great man who deserves more than anyone to be a father. I love him and all that he does for me. I love that he is willing to put up with me and all my rapid mood changes. I hope you have a great day.

Love you,

Courtney

New Pictures

Shout outs

I just want to give a shout out to my older brother and his girlfriend Amy who recently gave birth to their daughter, Avery Olivia. I can't wait to see and hold her. Another grandchild for the parents to fawn over.

I also want to say Happy 50Th Birthday to Chris's Mother. We are all very thankful she agreed to come to dinner where we were all waiting to surprise her.

Lastly, I want to express our sadness with the departure of our agency coordinator, Rachel. She has been a great comfort to us in times of uncertainty and of course, a joy to speak with in times of joy. We will greatly miss her and wish her all the luck in her next adventure. We will miss sharing our news with her.

Have a great turkey day. Don't eat too much. Good luck to those who plan to shop the next day.

Eats and walks well

I received a great email today from the agency. They were able to give us some details about how and what Nhi is doing in the orphanage. The wife of the director of the agency visited the children in our province on Sunday. She was able to send back some information on how he is doing. I'll just cut and paste her email.

Son Nhi is a handsome boy. He is the Vice Director's favorite so she threw a birthday for him awhile ago. He eats well, sleeps extremely well. He takes a long nap (4-5 hours straight) during the day and sleeps thru the night. He is active and plays a lot with other kids. He also likes to go outside. He is very sweet. He eats very well too. He can walk very well, his fine motor skills are good too. He likes to pick up dry leaves and play with them.

Now we know why he was outside with the motorcycle. This was a great email to get since we had no idea where he was developmental. Now, it's time to think about gating the house up before we go. LOL. We still have not heard anything about travel dates but we hope it will be resolved soon.

New Pic

As you can see we received a new picture of our boy. He is getting bigger but it's hard for me to really tell without seeing him everyday. I'm not sure where the picture was taken but apparently near a motorcycle. We joke that he is so smart that he was working on the motorcycle when they took his picture. From this picture I feel like there is a good possibility that he is walking or starting to try.

There is no new news at this point for travel. We continue to wait and that's all we can do. The agency has been through these blockades before and gets through them but it requires patience from the families and the agency. We are dealing with another country's governmental system, they are not as organized as ours, or efficient. We are basically taking one of their citizens from them and before we do so they want to make sure everything is legal, ethical and right for their citizen. We have to trust that they will do the right thing for Nhi and his fellow orphans and let them come home to waiting, loving and caring families.

I appreciate all the thoughts and prayers you have sent our way. It's been hard to deal with knowing he won't be here with us for the holidays.It's hard knowing he won't get to meet our families and friends during this time but with good distractions and understanding we are able to make it through each day.

Flooding

There has been very intense flooding occurring in Vietnam in the last two weeks. Several families from our agency have been there during the rains and lived through it. Some of them sat on buses for hours in deep water trying to get their new babies back to the hotels. Here is a link to some pictures of the flooding.

http://vnexpress.net/GL/Doi-song/2008/11/3BA080EE/

http://www.vnexpress.net/GL/Xa-hoi/2008/11/3BA080FF/

It's pretty wild to see how well they have adapted to dealing with the flooding.

No baby in 08

Yeah, you read it right. The agency said with the police hold up in our providence, travel seems unlikely this year. Even if the police signed off in the next week our paperwork has to go to IAD - International Adoption Department, then to PDOJ - Provincial Department of Justice; then to
PPC-People’s Provincial Committee then we get travel dates. This is unlikely to happen in less than 2 months.

There is no new time frame on travel, we will go when it's all approved. The police must sign off on our dossier along with many other families. They have tried to put more pressure on him through the Vietnamese agencies. They say he will answer on all the cases, they just didn't say when. The IAD, PDOJ and the police intend to meet to discuss why these cases have not been approved. Also we don't know when this will happen.

For now all I know is we are sad, upset and disappointed that Nie will not be with us this holiday season.

Adoption is a difficult process with roller coasters of emotions. I appreciate all the thoughts you have given us. We still hope to maybe know when we will travel before the end of the year (however that is not even a guarantee).

Need something to do

I need something to do in order to keep my mind busy. I started packing the other day thinking that would occupy my time for a while. I have taken many lists from other families who have traveled or that have thought about what is needed. I typed up a list of things that we needed to buy to pack. I had to put all my summer clothes away anyway so instead I just picked out several outfits to pack for the warm Vietnam climate. Then, I started gather up all the toiletries and baby items that were on the lists. I have been saving these little plastic containers from CVS that had Q-tips in them and they are great for packing small bottles of shampoo, lotions etc.

We took the list and went to Target where I have numerous gift cards from friends and family. We bought $85.00 in toiletries and baby items. So I finished off my list. Then we decided we needed a bigger suitcase to pack all this stuff in to check. The most important items will go in our carry-ons. We don't trust the airlines, mostly because Chris worked for them and knows what they do with bags. We like to carry-on our luggage, but with an international flight and on the way home a baby, we didn't think that was possible. More gift cards later, we bought a nice size piece of luggage to check.

Now, I'm 98% packed, not including Chris's clothes. He will have to pack his own roll around luggage. All I will need to pack is his (Nieman) clothes (I'm waiting on sizes), my daily use stuff (makeup, toothbrush etc.) and I'm ready to go. Did you hear that, I'm ready to go so CALL US ALREADY!!!

Now, I need a new project! Any ideas?

Feel like a Mom already

I was telling Chris (DH) the other day that I already feel like a Mom. I was off on Monday and I spent the whole day cleaning his room, doing his laundry and putting together a little project for him. I said I already don't sleep due to the stress of not having him with us. So the only thing I need really is Him, to play with, to bathe, to dress, to feed, to put to bed, to hug and kiss and to love.

Anyway, he is 17 months old now as of Saturday. I spent the day at a baby shower for him thrown by a close friend I work with. She had cute light blue lanterns hanging from the lights and a bamboo mat as a tablecloth. She also found all these cute candies from Asia and chopsticks to decorate the table with. It was a great day, beautiful, sunny and warm. We were able to sit outside on her patio and play cute adoption and occupational therapy orientated baby games. We are all Occupational Therapists and the games were really geared towards things we learn to look for in children, the developmental stages.

I was trying to organize his room on Monday to help feel a little more in control of it all. We have decided to buy some furniture for his room from IKEA. I think it will really work out well and keep me from melting down about all the toys and clothes he will have all over.

No news yet but we will shout from the rooftops once we hear when we can travel. I will be sending out a massive email to everyone when we hear.

I-600 Approval

Great news, today! We received our I-600 approval today. This was the last paperwork step we were waiting for prior to traveling. The wait is not over, however, we still must wait for the Giving & Receiving Ceremony (G & R) to be set. This is where things slow for us. The police chief in our providence has been slowing the process for all the families that have their I-600 approvals. He is the only person left to sign off on our dossier that was submitted back in July, along with 9 other families.

Our agency director is/was in country trying to speak with the police chief to push our cases through. I have not heard if he has made any progress. The agency has stated that if he doesn't approve them, the other government agencies will try to go around him.

Everyone keep your fingers crossed that the police chief approves everyone or they go around him in the next couple weeks. He is the last blockade to us getting Nieman.

I'm so excited and relieved to receive this approval today, it makes my weekend. So anyone out to ruin it will not succeed.

For my son

I love you more as time goes by.
I love you so much it makes me cry.
I love you without holding you at night.
Your little faces shines, you are my light.

We can't wait to have you home.
Your bed sits empty and alone.
Your room is filled with toys and clothes.
I just can't wait to kiss your nose.

The love I feel for you is strong.
The wait for you has been too long.
My patience is tired and my heart just aches.
I'll stick it out whatever it takes.

Time has passed, we are so close.
The pictures of you have helped the most.
I wait each day to get the news.
But all this red tape, gives me the blues.

No Tainted milk

I have had some people were have asked if the orphanage uses milk from China to feed the babies. The agency sent out a notice on this to the waiting families. It was said the only reason the milk from China has been found in Vietnam was due to it being smuggled or imported. Many orphanages use Vietnamese infant formula and there have been no concerns about them.

4 families in Thanh Hoa have received their last approvals and have tentative travel dates. We are so excited for those families and can't wait to read about their experiences during the trips. There are 2 families in Quang Binh who also have received tentative travel dates. We keep up hope that our providence will start approving some of the families before us. Good Luck everyone!

New pictures

We received new pictures yesterday. They are from the Director's trip over to the orphanage. Nieman is wearing the new clothes we sent. It's so exciting and heartbreaking all at the same time to see him in something we know came from us. I would love more to have him home with us. That way I could put his new clothes on him. He look so big!

In related news, the Director's visit did not have the huge outcome we had hoped for. The officials in the providence were not forthcoming about the delays. Other officials within the country are stating that it is because adoptions have never been attempted from this particular providence. Authorities are stating the police officials have "questions" about cases, yet we don't know what "questions" or what cases. We hope with the help of other parties who are experienced with adoptions in Vietnam the police officials may been eased in their concerns soon.
We are 35 days into our 60 days process, with our last documentation needed approval, the "I-600". Once this document is approved and all other parties have signed off on the adoption you get your G & R date. The (G & R) Giving and Receiving ceremony is the day Nieman would become official ours. So we keep our fingers crossed that in the next 30 or so business days the delays will cease and other families will start to travel. That will clear the road for us to travel.

It's complicated I know and I learn more of how the process works as we go through it all. I love him so much already, it hurts. It's difficult, days like this make me want to cry for happiness and sadness that comes with this process.

Happy Anniversary

I know this blog is mostly about Nieman (who turned 16 months yesterday), but today is a very special day. It is our 10 year anniversary and I wanted to let Courtney know how much she means to me. It doesn’t seem that long ago on a bright sunny Saturday afternoon that we began our life together. She is a wonderful person with a good heart and great sense of humor (all be it weird at times). We have had ups and downs like all married couples, but I would certainly say the ups far out weigh to downs. These last 10 year have been the greatest and with the addition of Nieman to our family I can see the next 10 being even better.

Love you and 10th Happy Anniversary.

He is growing

We received new measurements today. Nieman is now 19.8 pounds and 28 inches. We have NOT received any new photos yet, but the agency is pushing the orphanage to take some new photos of all the children. I hope to get a picture of him in the clothes we sent.

We are still waiting on news of how the Director visit to the provinces is going. He arrived on Monday but no news yet. This visit could greatly impact the advancement of our progress. He hopes to make a "push" in the direction of getting these children home. We are still unsure of our timeline but keep hoping that it will happen as originally thought, in November sometime.

I will post any new picture as soon as we get them.

Thank you

Chris and I want to thank everyone who came to or sent a gift to our shower. We appreciate the support and love that everyone gave us yesterday. It was a great day and we truly enjoyed spending it with our friends and family.

We also want to thank Michelle and Greg for the location, Lauree, Joe and Sheila for the food and Liz for the preparation, decorations and beverages. You guys made the day very special. We love you all.

This has been a long and difficult process and the fact that everyone is so understanding and welcoming to our new addition is a relief and blessing. Thank you for coming to the shower and supporting us and our new addition to the family.

I can't wait to spend the time going through everything again to see all the cute things that Nieman has waiting for him. I also can't wait to organize it all so that we are ready to travel and for him to come home.

Nieman gets new clothes

This week we were able to send somethings to the baby. The Executive Director/CEO of our agency is traveling over to Vietnam on the 8th of this month. He was willing to take a gallon sized zip lock bag of items to each of the children in our Providence.

We wanted to get Nieman some new clothes. The last couple picture we received of him he was wearing the same outfit. We assumed this was because the orphanage just doesn't have a variety of clothes to put on the children. I bought him a cute pair of plaid shorts and a little bodysuit with a front loader and the word DIG on it. I also bought him a jersey type shirt with a soccer goal on it. It said One goal, one net. I paired that with a pair of grey sweat pant material shorts.

I also threw together a little scrapbook/photo album for him. I put a couple pictures of us and other family members. I labeled the pictures in English and Vietnamese. Finding the translations was difficult but I made it work. I threw in two pairs of socks and a "teether toy". I was surprised it all fit but very happy, also.

This was the closest thing we've come to connecting with our child since we saw his picture for the first time. It was a weird feeling knowing for sure that the items we bought were actually going to go to him. We are only 23 days into our "60 days" for our next step, the I-600 approval. We still have some time to wait before we are able to travel. We hope that with the director visit it will start moving those in front of us along that when our "60 days" is up, we will travel right away. Everyone keep our fingers crossed.

New blog items

We have decided to start adding some articles for people to read to understand all the things we may experience but have trouble explaining to everyone. You will see a new item Helpful Articles on the left. I plan to post any articles that I feel not only do we benefit from but you reading this will find interesting as well.

It has been hard to answer all the questions, sometimes because it takes so much time, other times because we don't have the answer. I hope some of the articles will help everyone with some of those questions you ask and those you maybe afraid of asking.

Those of you that know me, I'm a private person and this blog is really the best way to get answers from me so I'm trying my best to help us all.

Happy reading.

Back to the Orphanage

Our little "Nhi" is out of the hospital. He was released today and returned to the orphanage. He will continue to take medications to treat the remaining pneumonia. We are happy to know that everything worked out just fine, even though, we weren't there to take care of him. We thank you all for your kind words, wishes and prayers. We are hoping this outbreak will get noticed by the right people and families will start to be approved to travel.

Our last form "I-600" was submitted 2 weeks ago. It takes some time usually but we are keeping our fingers crossed that now, things will move quicker, knowing there is a potential health risk for these children.

On a side note: Nhi room is getting it's last coat of paint today and hopefully by our first shower we will have some things in place to put all the toys and clothes that are waiting for him.

Out of the ER

I just received report that Nhi has been moved out of the ER and is just in the normal care section of the hospital. He is doing much better and will hopefully recovery quickly. The agency has updated us with all that has been going on in the orphanage in Bac Lieu. Here is some of what she said.

"It has been a difficult week for several children in Bac Lieu who are struggling with illness and who were admitted to the hospital. A total of 5 children are currently in the care of the Bac Lieu General hospital receiving treatment for pneumonia. I have informed all families who are directly affected by this situation. Several children at the Bac Lieu orphanage have been fighting (to varying degrees) diarrhea, upper respiratory infections and, in some cases, pneumonia. Please know that FTIA, the Bac Lieu orphanage, Vietnamese health officials and doctors & nurses at the Bac Lieu General Hospital are taking the situation very seriously. We are following up with families as often as there are updates about their particular child's situation. In cases when it is necessary to admit a child to the Bac Lieu General Hospital, we feel confident that the hospital is able to provide the level of care that is needed.

In response to this very unfortunate event, FTIA is working with provincial and orphanage officials to be as cooperative as possible. Children in orphanages often trade germs and infections because they live in such close proximity to one another. The current weather in Bac Lieu is also thought to be a factor, partly because this recent spike in illness and hospital admissions is not limited to the orphanage. As such, the Bac Lieu Preventative Health Center has already visited the orphanage to sanitize and sterilize the facility so that the environment is as healthy as possible for those children living there. We also informed the IAD, DOLISA and all relevant parties of what is happening, asking for their cooperation to urge officials in Vietnam to process these adoption cases as efficiently as possible so that children do not remain in the orphanage unnecessarily long, especially when they have adoptive families waiting and eager to receive them.

In this situation, you are undoubtedly asking what you can do to help and worrying about the safety of the child you hope to bring into your family. Please be assured that FTIA will inform any family directly affected by this situation, and we will also keep all families informed of the general situation. For now, I ask that you keep these children and families in your thoughts and prayers. I will be in touch as there is more news to share. "

What I left off was that, of those children that were hospitalized, a little girl that was referred had passed away from an infection more serious than pneumonia. It was an awful bit of news to hear. It has been very difficult to focus on the good news we have received, knowing Nhi is getting better, when another family in our same situation has suffered such a great loss. We wish them all our good thoughts, prayers and condolences.

He's sick.

We received news on Monday from the agency that Nieman and 3 other children from his orphanage are sick. They felt they might have pneumonia so they were taken to the local hospital to get treatment.

Tuesday, we found out he did have confirmed pneumonia and was receiving oxygen treatments to help his breathing. Today, we heard he is doing much better. We are receiving very little information from the Dr., but the agency assures us that if it was more serious they would give us the details.

It's been a bumpy ride over the last two weeks for the family. My mom has been in the hospital for 2 weeks. I was hit in the head by a basketball from one of my patients, accidentally, and received a slight concussion and now Nieman is in the hospital. So we need some good wishes and prayers, if so desired.

I will post more when we hear more.

Progress

We have had progress in our movement through this wonderful world of paper chase. We finally finished our documents that needed to be updated. We were of the of few that turned in all of our dossier documents prior to the agency making others wait until referral or "crunch time". Everything was done, but since it has been such a long wait there were a few documents that needed to be re-done/renewed. We needed new police report, medical reports, an updated home study and renew our our Petition to Adopt. Along with getting the documents you must notarize them, county certify them, state certify and then send them to DC for Vietnam authentication.

The more you go up the ladder with the system the more the documents cost to have these things done. Notary was free (Eileen at Chris's work did them) County Certification $1.00 each, State Certification $5.00 each, Country Authentication $85.00 each (this includes speedy service 2 day turnaround). We got that all done and sent to the agency. They were accepted and sent to Vietnam today.

Just the other day I was sitting at work on my unit with "crazy" men yelling constantly and one bad news bomb after another. I said to one of the nurses that I work with "I need some happy news". I checked my email and there was an email from the agency stating our I-600 had been sent. This is good news because essentially it is the last paper step. We now wait for I-600 approval and a Giving and Receiving Ceremony to be set, then we travel. It's funny sometimes you get what you ask for. It usually doesn't happen to me so I was surprised.

The I-600 can take 60 days before getting the approval. Some families have waited 60 calendar days, some have waited 60 business days. All I can do is wait and hope it goes sooner. I just try to stay busy with other things, like running (I'm up to 4 miles).

Did I mention I'm training for a half marathon (13.1 miles.)? Liz started me on the path and now she and I both need the confidence that we could do it. It is October 19Th. So we have more time to train.

Just a little good news, brightens a week.

14 months

It's been 14 months since we were placed on the waiting list. Nieman turned 14 months old this month. I always wondered if I would be able to remember what I was doing when my child was born. Now that I know his birthday, I was looking at last year's calendar. May 11, 2007 was a Friday. It was a beautiful day with a high of 86 degrees. I think I went to dinner with Chris and probably Glenn since that is what we usually do on Fridays.

It's been hard waiting for him, not knowing what he is doing every minute of the day. Is he crawling around, is he trying to pull himself up to stand? Does he say any words yet? It's hard knowing he is growing up without me there to see it, experience it and enjoy it. Everyone can't wait to meet him and are very excited to see his new pictures. He has two cute little bottom teeth poking through. He looks happy and well taken care of and that is the one thing that gets me through each day.

Nieman has a bed waiting for him. Grandma J bought him a crib, she said Grandpa would have wanted to make sure he had a great place to sleep. As soon as we finish his room, we will put it together and put pictures on the blog.

Chris has put is smiley, happy picture on the site already. So enjoy, we'll keep you posted on any news.

He has a name!

After 2 weeks, Chris and I have thought long about how to incorporate his birth name with a name that will fit him here in the U.S. We have decided to name our son: Nieman Allen Janney. We felt like Nieman was fitting because when shortened by friends and family it will become Nie. His middle name Allen is in tribute to Chris's grandfather that past away after a long battle with Alzheimer's. We hope now that we all feel better knowing he has name. Thank you all for the suggestions.

We officially introduce the newest member of our family: Nieman Allen Janney.

Updates

We have accepted the referral of our "little one" Nhi. We will be completing more paperwork over the next couple days and weeks. This will include a trip to Columbus (for all the northern friends and family) to get the documents state certified. After that we will be sending the documents to San Francisco for the Vietnam authentication.

Once all of our renewed documents are in along with the approval of our petition to adopt to has been approved by the Vietnamese government, we will get a travel time. The agency is says the travel time will be 5 1/2 months from now, which is late November.

We also got an update on Nhi's measurements: Head circumference 44 cm or 17.3 inches, Chest circumference 45 cm or 17.7 inches, length is 67 cm or 26.3 inches and his weight is 8.4 kg or 18.5 lbs. He is growing well. We also hope to get new pictures maybe once a month depending on if the staff there can get it emailed to the agency.

We are all very excited and can't wait to travel-please bear with us- it's going to be a hard wait for the travel dates as it is and when we know more we will update you all. We love the support but there are many questions we don't have answers to and want you all to be willing to let us get through this rough time without more anxiety and worry. Keep reading this blog to get the updates. Love you all.

Referral

We received "the call" yesterday from our agency. We have been referred a little boy. He was born 5/11/07, which makes him almost 13 months old. His given name is Son Nhi (Nhi is his first name meaning Little One). We have not decided on the name we want to give him! He was born very premature weighing only 3 lbs at birth. He stayed in the hospital after birth for 2 months prior to going to the orphanage.

The agency sent us all of his medical information and a bunch of pictures. He is determined to be healthy with the possibility of needing glasses later on in his life. As of 4/5/08 he weighed 17 lbs and is 24 inches tall.

We sent all his information to Children's Hospital. They have an International Adoption Center. They will review all his information to make sure the agency didn't miss anything. We will get a call from them on Monday and will send our paperwork back to the agency with our acceptance.

After the referral is accepted, we hope to travel in 4-5 months. We hope that will be early November. We will post his pictures on the blog also.

We are very excited and will give updates on him as they come.

Matched!!!!!!

We have received a match for a child, a little boy to be exact. We received a call from the agency asking if we were willing to accept a match for a little boy from the Bac Lieu providence (a lower providence). He was abandoned by his mother or birth parents. He was born 5/2007, so he will turn one sometime this month. We don't have the exact date for his birth. The agency can't give you a lot of information at "match". He was thought to have some vision problems when he was first found and checked over. The agency has taken him to an ophthalmologist in Hanoi and the Dr stated that there was nothing wrong with his eyes that would require surgery but that he may need glasses later on in life. How cute would it be if he looked like Aiden from John and Kate + 8. I would melt.

Chris and I accepted the match and waited 2 weeks before we decide to spread the news. The first letter went out to the PDOJ (Provincial Department of Justice) that a family (us) has accepted him as a prospective adoptive child. It came back already and now it goes to the CCC (Child Care Center) asking for the referral. We hope it get the referral at the end of June, if all goes well.

After we get the referral, travel should happen anywhere from 4-5 months later. We hope to have him home by Christmas. Merry Christmas to all!!

I will post more when we know more. Thanks for all your support.

DON'T FREAK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello all,

Don't freak out, for those of you who read the world news. Yes, we have heard that the agreement between Vietnam and the U.S. expires September 1st. Our agency has been keeping us up to date on the developments with the agreement.

Our agency as recently as last month has issued this update to waiting families:

As you know, FTIA is actively engaged and advocating for a new Vietnam - U.S. Memorandum of Agreement to be in place by September 1st so that Vietnam adoptions by American citizens can continue uninterrupted. At the same time, we recognize that despite the best efforts of all parties a new agreement may not be in place by September 1st. If this happens, we hope and expect that families who have submitted dossiers (which we have) to the IAD will be able to continue the Vietnam adoption process even if they do not have a referral at that point.

Other rumors you will hear soon that our agency is keeping us up to date on:

There has also been a rumor that as of April 1, 2008 Vietnam will suspend licenses to operate in Vietnam for all agencies who have not been Hague-accredited. Although there has been some discussion between American and Vietnamese officials about criteria for allowing American agencies to continue operations in Vietnam, this issue is far from decided. If, in fact, Vietnam moves forward with plans to require American adoption service providers to be Hague Accredited, FTIA is well-positioned to continue our work in Vietnam. We were among the first group of adoption agencies to receive Hague accreditation on February 29, 2008.

There is a rumor that the USCIS is going to require DNA testing for all children who are relinquished by a single or both biological parent(s). The USCIS has not made a formal memorandum on this yet. If this does move forward, FTIA has already contacted a certified DNA testing laboratory who will be able to process the DNA samples for our Vietnam adoption cases. It is important to note that the USCIS has not made a formal announcement regarding this process.

We realize this news, is just that news to you, for us, however, we have been prepared for this news and are with a very reputable agency that as only the best interest in mind for the waiting families. We are very confident that if this would make a huge impact on our status with the adoption, the agency would have let us know. The agency sends out a weekly update every Friday to inform the waiting families on current news and developments in Vietnam and with their status.

The media is always trying to make any agreements between the U.S. and other countries look more dramatic than they are. They are always first to blame the other countries for the failures, also. There are always going to be problems like this in any country for many reasons. Any system is going to have it's flaws and anything is possible if you have enough money to make it happen. There are many couples like us, that are having trouble getting pregnant on their own. Some of those people have more money than they know what to do with. Some of those people feel that they are above the system and try to get out of waiting through the red tape and instead try their best to buy their way around it. As the old saying goes, "It only takes one person to ruin it for the rest of us." If there weren't people out there willing to pay more money than required to get a baby then there would not be illegal baby selling.

Vietnam may shut their doors to us come September 1st but our agency is expecting that anyone with them who has submitted their dossier to the IAD will be allowed to continue with the process. Chris and I are feel very secure in are position on the list and hope to bring everyone good news soon.

THANK YOU for caring about us and this process. It is a very difficult process but we are open to any questions you may have. We have done are homework on all of this and plan to have a new addition soon. WE LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the upswing

The agency is on an upswing. There have been 3 referrals so far this month, 2 infant girls and 1 infant boy. The agency also says there are 7 other families that have been "matched" with children and are waiting for their referrals. This is all positive news for us. It means we are "movin on up".

I have an "unofficial wait list" mapped out from the info I get through the agency's chat room. I have that there are 3 families ahead of us waiting for either gender referrals or specifically boys, then I have 3 families including us that all have the same date our paperwork was approved by the International Adoption Department (IAD) in Vietnam. By my count, we could be anywhere from 4Th on the list to 6Th on the list for a boy referral. This also doesn't include anyone who doesn't get on the chat room site and share their progress. So far my list has been almost 100% accurate.

I really have been trying to stay positive in my postings on this site. It's been very hard waiting for a call, an email whatever to come our way. At the end of the month, we will have been on the list for 11 months. This is not a long time to wait considering the agency is telling us 15-18 months for a referral so I track it as right on time.

We have not been "matched" yet with a child, however, if I was I'm not supposed to share that info. This is to protect the agency and us. There is always a potential that something could change with that baby's status and it's not considered "official" until the referral. But I will do my best to keep everyone posted.

One family is back from Vietnam. They were referred a little boy back in September and have really been the "guinea pig family" since all the changes in paperwork have taken place. Everything went smooth and they were in country for 14 days. We wish them all the luck. Soon it will be us on our way home.

Once a month

It looks like I'm only posting once a month, the reason, I don't have much to say. No news on the baby. There was one little girl referral in March and one family is in country now picking up their little boy. The more families start to travel the more we will learn about the process in country.

In other news, I have decided to compete in a triathlon. I was already in the process of getting ready to play outdoor soccer starting at the end of this month. I was also getting in shape for my trip to Vegas with the girls in 15 days. Now, I need to intensify the workouts and the quantity of them. Chris is getting ready for his regular season of softball. He and the team have already competed in a tournament and are trying to get in batting practice as much as possible. So we both have things to keep our minds off this adoption process. We are in the waiting part and with nothing to keep our minds busy all we do is think about how long it's taking. My triathlon is June 1 and softball starts end of the month?? Not sure on that.

We will be keeping our fingers crossed that we hear something soon and will let everyone know when we do.

It's March

It's March. A year ago, on the 23rd of this month we had completed all our paperwork for our dossier. We sent to off to be reviewed by the agency. This is, of course, before they decided to stop having the families do their dossier ahead of time. May of last year, the agency decided that since the wait was getting longer that the families should wait to do all their paperwork until after they got their referrals. We lucked out on that and now only have to update our police reports and our doctor's reports once we get the referral.

I was hoping to be "matched" by this month but I don't want to get too optimistic and just get let down at the end of the month. We are at the stage of "aggravation, disappointment and lack of hope". We really appreciate people staying interested in the process for so long. It's hard for us to give any additional information when we don't get updates ourselves but it's nice when you know people still do think about you.

Another good thing this month is my birthday. Year 30 was rough and I'll be glad to put it behind me and move on to year 31. I would like to give a shout out to the other March birthdays we know: My cousins in Florida, Kevin and Kyle on the 7th, my friend from OT school Dawn on the 9th and our friend Chris on the 30th.

Continue the well wishes and we will continue to update you on the progress, no matter how slow.

Happy Valentine's Day

I wanted to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day. I hope you get to spend time with people you love. No news on the adoption front. It's been slow due to the holiday. 12 families have referrals and are waiting on their paperwork to be approved before they can travel. We are keeping our fingers crossed that in the next few months we hear of a referral for our family.

Again, Happy Valentine's Day

Tet

I want familiarize you with the Vietnamese holiday Tet. We hope to take part in this celebration with our child throughout their life to keep them in touch with the heritage and country’s culture.

Tet is a popular holiday and festival in Vietnam. Tet is a celebration of the New Year. This year it starts on February 7, 2008, the holiday lasts three days. 2008 is the Year of the Rat or Mouse. This year marks the beginning of the 12 month cyclical zodiac of animals.

Prior to the start of Tet, people clean and paint their homes, making everything spotless. Old clothes are given away are new ones are bought for the celebrations. Paying back debts before Tet is customary and arguments are avoided and mistakes are forgiven. This signifies a new beginning.

During Tet, everyone visits family and friends. It is believed the first visitor of the new year brings good or bad luck with them. Families often invite someone important or well liked to be their first visitor to make sure their luck is good. It is an honor to be asked to be the first visitor in someone’s home.

Children receive li xi (red envelopes containing money) from their elders. Some families hang many li xi on a tree in their home to give to visitors. Children will don their new clothes and give their elders traditional Tet greetings before receiving the money. The children are free to spend their money on toys or on gambling games such as bau cua ca cop.

Customs during Tet are giving lucky presents to others to enhance your relationship, new clothes, new rice, rice wine, red things (red symbolizes happiness, luckiness & advantages). People buy a lot of water on Tet holiday because many people wish money to flow in streams like water currents. Some things that should not be done during Tet to prevent bad luck are: saying or doing bad things. You should not sweep the house or empty the trash or you may lose luckiness. You should not wear white clothes because white is the color of funerals in Vietnam.

Food during Tet is usually vegetarian since it is believed to be bad luck to eat meat on that day. Bang chung is tightly packed sticky rice with bean fillings wrapped in banana leaves. It can take days to cook so it must be prepared prior to the start of Tet. No cooking is to be done during Tet. Hat Dua are roasted watermelon seeds, Cu Kieu are pickled vegetables.

We hope that you are interested in the holiday and in the future come out to celebrate with our new family.

The wait goes on

We are still anxiously waiting to hear from the agency. There have been 7 referrals so far this month. That is a record since we've been with the agency. The agency hopes to be able to refer just as many next month, however, the holiday may slow it down. What holiday you may ask? Many of you have heard of Chinese New Year well, it is similar. Vietnamese call it Tet (their version of the New Year.) The country shuts down for 1 week at the beginning of February to celebrate. I will post more on the Holiday in the next week.

We are trying to finish the baby's room. Chris needs to replace the ceiling and started to remove all the finish work. Unfortunately, his foot was injured and we now will have to wait until he is out of his cast and started PT. This will be helpful to me because I'm still torn on the room color. Right now, it's yellow and I think I want to change it to sage green. It works with both a boy or a girl. I have narrowed down the theme of the room, Classic Winnie the Pooh. Some of the things I have registered for at Target are the Classic Winnie the Pooh and it has a sage undertone.

I will post more on the upcoming holiday and how we will be celebrating with the baby next year. Everyone keep your fingers crossed for good news, SOON.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year. A new year brings good news from our agency. They have referred 4 more babies, 3 infant boys and 1 infant girl. I will not know how far up the list we move until the families identify themselves. I have based our standing on the list of the other families who are active in the agency chat room. The agency stated that some of the families referred these children are not active in the chat room. I don't know what that means because I go to the chat room but I don't post in the conversations, so does that mean I'm not active. As many of you know I have a pseudo waiting list, it is based on information from the chat group. One member put together a database where each family could put where they were at in the process. I have made my list from that database. It's not completely accurate but of the referrals so far it's been right on so I have been relying on it.

Chris and I are hoping that 2008 will be our year. Our ten year anniversary, a new baby and a happily ever after.