Movin on up

We are moving on up the list. The agency has referred another little boy to a couple on the list. They had some paper delays so things have moved slower than they would have liked. He was born June 30th.

The agency states that 7 families have either been referred or have the paperwork on a referral and are waiting to accept. I know of 4 families referred. The agency also states that there have been 10 families matched with children with referrals to follow. This doesn't gives me a good idea of where we are but it's great for the families above us to be moving forward. It means we are moving forward.

The only downfall in this new system is the delays. In a pregnancy, it is easier to know where you are at. The baby grows and comes out after 10 months, with adoption it's difficult to hear that it could be 12-18 months before you see your baby. So even after we get our referral the agency is saying it could takes 3-4 months before we travel. So I'm thinking it pushes my estimation of time back to maybe June before we travel. That is only if we get matched soon. Hopefully 2008 will be our year. Match, referral, travel and baby.

Have a good holiday. We'll keep you posted

More referrals

I just saw in my adoption group chat room that there has been another referral. A little girl. I was also looking at a blog for a couple who is next on the list for a boy. They have been matched with a little boy. No word on when they will get their referral. The agency has been right so far as saying an equal number of boys and girls are being referred. Everyone keep your fingers crossed that we get a match here soon. Once we do and feel like things will work out we will let everyone know. I don't want to be over zealous and too optimist before things are confirmed and moving along. 3 referrals in 3 months is okay with 11 more matched out there it's moving along, just slowly. With changes bring slow downs. Once the first few families get through these new procedures then things will start to move at a quicker pace. Trying to stay positive it's hard but it officially only been 6 months since our paperwork was accepted by the Vietnam government. The family that got their little boy referral was exactly one year in waiting. The family who got their little girl referral was 18 months in waiting. And that is the timeframe we were told 12-18 months. Funny.

How much stuff does a baby need

I have started to register for baby items, unfortunately, I can't register for a lot yet. Until we know the gender, age and size of the baby it's too hard to register for clothes and other items. I thought this would be a fun process. It hasn't been. I know I'm over thinking all of it, not a big surprise to certain people.

Chris and I have have been looking at Target and we have made 3 trips to Babies r us to look around. I have changed my mind several times on certain items. This process has not been like when we registered for our wedding. Then it didn't matter, maybe you used it, maybe you didn't. With baby items you have to worry about safety, durability and for me space. These items I'm using with a baby. So I've consulted a book (Baby Bargains) that Tracy loaned me, that Michelle loaned her, Thanks Michelle!! It's a good book but now I'm obsessing over the fine print of the items listed in this book.

First I started my registries on-line (the stores overwhelm me) but I couldn't find some of the things I saw in the store. So this morning I went out to Target (Target in Western Hills too small). Now I'm more confused about what to register for. I know there are some mothers out there that have been through this, is this how it goes for everyone? Some of the things I am confused on are a changing table (expensive), changing pad, mattress and the monitor. Some of the things Chris and I have a difference of opinion on gates, exerciser or bouncer and 2nd car seat.

I feel like I'm done registering at this time. It's too hard to make these choices for a little baby. Chris said it should be fun and everyone else reading this is thinking "She makes things more difficult than the need to be". So I'm going to concentrate on Christmas. Everyone knows I love Christmas!! Ha Ha :).

Update 11/26/07

I know it’s been several months since you’ve heard anything from us on the baby. With the holiday right around the corner many people will be thinking of friends and family. Chris and I have been thinking it’s time to give an update. First, let’s go over the lingo of adoption to keep everyone on the same page.

Matched-means a family as been identified as next in line for age and/or gender of a particular baby. The family will have to wait until the baby is paper-ready for their “officially referral”

Paper ready- a Vietnamese baby has gone through their (2) 30-day media announcements to identify a family (bio or in-country) that would like to claim them after abandonment.

Paper ready sounds simple,however, as all the state employees that are reading this blog know, no government system runs quickly. Usually a baby is not paper-ready for 4 to 5 ½ months after abandonment. (see below on what it takes to be paper ready)

Referred or Referral-means the baby is officially paper ready to adopt and the family has received their packet of information on the baby to accept the referral.

Now, the good news, two babies have been officially referred to families in our agency, 1 boy and 1 girl. The agency also states that 10 other families have been matched with babies. So any way you slice it we have moved up 12 spots. It’s great news. We feel like we are still on track to receive a referral in March or April. This is a very difficult period for us because it is filled with such uncertainty.

Those of you who know me well, I am trying my best to keep us organized and on track with the things that must get done before we bring our baby home. We wish you all the best this holiday season and look forward to updating the blog with more good news.

How a baby becomes paper ready

1. A baby is abandoned. Authorities prepare initial paperwork, including the witness declaration and initial police report. Childcare Centre (CCC) staff request child's information to be posted in the local media, 15 days.

2. 1st Media announcement, 30 days.

3. Authorities prepare paperwork, including child's birth certificate, prior to 2nd announcement, 15 days.

4. 2nd Media announcement, 30 days.

5. FTIA (our agency) sends letter to IAD (international Adoption Department) to request the introduction of a child to the family. (Please note that FTIA will not send the initial request to the IAD for a family to be matched with a referral until we are aware of a child that meets the family's criteria.), 1 day.

6. IAD prepares letter to Provincial Department of Justice (PDOJ) asking if there is any child meeting the requirements of the family. This 1st IAD letter is called 1 A, 2 days.

7. IAD 1A Letter reaches PDOJ (IAD normally sends letter by registered regular mail), 7 days.

8. PDOJ sends request for a child matching the requirements of family to the Childcare Center, 15 days.

9. CCC sends report letter to PDOJ to confirm if there is a child meeting the family's requirements, 7 days.

10. PDOJ forwards the CCC's reply to the IAD, 14 days.

11. The IAD informs FTIA that there is a child to be matched with a prospective family. FTIA then makes the official referral and we wait for family to accept or decline the referral. If the family agrees to the placement, we submit the family's confirmation letter to the IAD indicating that the family has agreed to adopt the identified child.3 days for IAD to inform FTIA; FTIA will notify family ASAP.

This is why is takes 41/2 to 5 months after a baby is abandoned before they can be adopted.

Quick English Vietnamese Phrases 2.

Check out this site for some helpful and handy vietnamese translations

http://www.vietcali.com/qevp/qevp2.html